Dr. Skenderian has numerous publications which will soon be listed here. His most recent publication, which follows, was published in the American Society of Clinical Hypnosis newsletter, Summer, 2010 edition.
The Tree
My Teacher, the Patient: A Hypnotic Tale
Daniel Skenderian, Ph.D.
In 1984, after marrying, my wife and I moved from Souther California to Minneapolis, Minnesota. It was a time in my career when I was ready for a change and I had the opportunity to join my best friend, Stan, in his private practice of psychology in Stillwater. Newly married, relocating, and starting a new clinical practice, I knew I was in for quite an experience. I was both excited and at the same time scared about this new possibility. Looking back on it, however, I hoped my excitement would be out in front. I had no idea that what was to come would be prophetic.
It was 7:30 one Tuesday morning when I arrived to see a new patient who had an appointment with me at 8. She had called me the week earlier after finding out from her friend that one of my specialties was mind-body relationships. Rosalind arrived for her appointment 10 minutes early, greeted me with a pleasant “hello”, and asked if I was Dr. Skenderian. After affirming her question, I invited her to have a seat in the waiting room while I completed my task of opening the office for the day ahead. Rosalind was a 70 year old widowed woman of small stature
who had a presence about her that was calming and reassuring. When I first spoke to her, I had this feeling that I was about to meet with someone who was coming in with a wealth of wisdom collected over the years. Of course, I cautioned myself to be cognizant of countertransference and hold my own projections in place. Where Rosalind was sitting in the waiting room, she had a full view of my office and me in it getting organized and prepared for the day. One preparation I had was to give my Ficus Benjamina tree a cup of water, as I regularly did once a week. The Ficus tree was in the corner of the room, in a large pot, and stoodapproximately 6 feet tall. I’ve been told these are sensitive trees in that they require continuous indirect light, but once established do very well. Watering this tree was my last act before inviting Rosalind to come in.
She gladly accepted my invitation and had a seat. Placing her purse on the floor beside her, Rosalind began by asking me, “How often do you water that tree?” I replied, “I give it about a cup each week,” knowing watering in a timely manner was a sensitivity this tree required. Rosalind came back with, “You know, if you skip a week once in awhile, you know, deprive it a little, the trees roots have to go looking for water and in the process stretch and reach causing more growth in themselves and the branches. The dryness makes the tree work a little harder.” I took it in what she said and we started the session.
It wasn’t until that night that I realized what she had said. My first thought was, of course, “Was she telling me literally about watering or was she telling me a therapeutic tale?” After some thought, I concluded that she was actually telling me how to water this tree, but that what she said I reorganized in my head and gave it meaning I don’t think she intended. But I actually used the instruction she gave me later on in our therapy, and this is where the true meaning of it came to life for me: I realized that some principles of botany apply to human behavior, especially when it comes to the importance of delayed gratification in maturation and growth. When need gratification is delayed, we develop our tolerances and push ourselves to reach a greater capacity. In the recovery community, it is said, “What doesn’t kill us makes us grow.” And we all have heard the saying, “Hard times build character.” I don’t think Rosalind actually “knew” what she was saying, but I knew she had within herself some answers that would be beneficial in our work. And it was.
My session with Rosalind was in 1985. Now, by 2010, I have told that story to hundreds of my patients. Invariably, when I begin telling the story, my patient enters into a waking trance so that by the time the story is done, they are ready for the suggestion. And the suggestion is usually, “even during hard times when you feel desperate, in need, or just ‘dry’, a deeper part of you is growing, reaching. You’re searching for sustenance and in the process you are growing. It just never feels that way at the time.” I have also told the story to hundreds of parents who work so hard to meet all needs of their growing teenage children. Holding off their need gratification gives them a chance to seek their own resources, options, and answers. I’ve never been challenged or confronted about its meaning.
As I’ve gotten older, and, hopefully, more seasoned, I’ve come to learn that my patients teach me about the practice of therapy. Books and seminars have their place, but I believe the true learning comes from those who come to us for help. I will always remember Rosalind as my teacher. When I was in the Peace Corps, our director told us that we would learn much more than we would give; this certainly was the case with Rosalind.
Hypnotic storytelling is an amazing application of hypnosis in psychotherapy. The telling of the tale induces a trance-like state and if the story parallels the client’s concern or problem, the outcome at the story’s end is the therapeutic suggestion that leads the client to a solution. In the alert, eyes-open state, these suggestions are as impactful had the client been in a deep, eyesclosed trance. When the story comes from the therapist’s personal experience, the impact is even more meaningful for both therapist and client. Over the years, I have kept a chronicle of personal experiences that I have used in therapy when the experience paralleled that of the client. I invite those of you who are interested in developing your own storytelling to do the same. Journal those experiences you’ve had that were meaningful to you. What you will experience can be magical for both you and your client.
Daniel Skenderian, PhD, received his doctorate from the University of North Texas in 1981. Dr. Skenderian is in full-time private practice in Claremont, California, is on staff at two local hospitals, and consults in a local sleep disorders center for adults and children. He is also an Adjunct Clinical Professor in the doctoral psychology program at The University of LaVerne. Dr.Skenderian has been an ASCH Approved Consultant for many years, and has been practicing hypnosis since 1985. He regularly utilizes hypnosis for insomnia, pain, and psychosomatic disorders. When not working, he enjoys kayaking, reading, writing, and watching his son grow up to be the young man he is today. Dr. Skenderian recently completed writing a one act play about a young man and his relationship with his dying father.
The Tree
My Teacher, the Patient: A Hypnotic Tale
Daniel Skenderian, Ph.D.
In 1984, after marrying, my wife and I moved from Souther California to Minneapolis, Minnesota. It was a time in my career when I was ready for a change and I had the opportunity to join my best friend, Stan, in his private practice of psychology in Stillwater. Newly married, relocating, and starting a new clinical practice, I knew I was in for quite an experience. I was both excited and at the same time scared about this new possibility. Looking back on it, however, I hoped my excitement would be out in front. I had no idea that what was to come would be prophetic.
It was 7:30 one Tuesday morning when I arrived to see a new patient who had an appointment with me at 8. She had called me the week earlier after finding out from her friend that one of my specialties was mind-body relationships. Rosalind arrived for her appointment 10 minutes early, greeted me with a pleasant “hello”, and asked if I was Dr. Skenderian. After affirming her question, I invited her to have a seat in the waiting room while I completed my task of opening the office for the day ahead. Rosalind was a 70 year old widowed woman of small stature
who had a presence about her that was calming and reassuring. When I first spoke to her, I had this feeling that I was about to meet with someone who was coming in with a wealth of wisdom collected over the years. Of course, I cautioned myself to be cognizant of countertransference and hold my own projections in place. Where Rosalind was sitting in the waiting room, she had a full view of my office and me in it getting organized and prepared for the day. One preparation I had was to give my Ficus Benjamina tree a cup of water, as I regularly did once a week. The Ficus tree was in the corner of the room, in a large pot, and stoodapproximately 6 feet tall. I’ve been told these are sensitive trees in that they require continuous indirect light, but once established do very well. Watering this tree was my last act before inviting Rosalind to come in.
She gladly accepted my invitation and had a seat. Placing her purse on the floor beside her, Rosalind began by asking me, “How often do you water that tree?” I replied, “I give it about a cup each week,” knowing watering in a timely manner was a sensitivity this tree required. Rosalind came back with, “You know, if you skip a week once in awhile, you know, deprive it a little, the trees roots have to go looking for water and in the process stretch and reach causing more growth in themselves and the branches. The dryness makes the tree work a little harder.” I took it in what she said and we started the session.
It wasn’t until that night that I realized what she had said. My first thought was, of course, “Was she telling me literally about watering or was she telling me a therapeutic tale?” After some thought, I concluded that she was actually telling me how to water this tree, but that what she said I reorganized in my head and gave it meaning I don’t think she intended. But I actually used the instruction she gave me later on in our therapy, and this is where the true meaning of it came to life for me: I realized that some principles of botany apply to human behavior, especially when it comes to the importance of delayed gratification in maturation and growth. When need gratification is delayed, we develop our tolerances and push ourselves to reach a greater capacity. In the recovery community, it is said, “What doesn’t kill us makes us grow.” And we all have heard the saying, “Hard times build character.” I don’t think Rosalind actually “knew” what she was saying, but I knew she had within herself some answers that would be beneficial in our work. And it was.
My session with Rosalind was in 1985. Now, by 2010, I have told that story to hundreds of my patients. Invariably, when I begin telling the story, my patient enters into a waking trance so that by the time the story is done, they are ready for the suggestion. And the suggestion is usually, “even during hard times when you feel desperate, in need, or just ‘dry’, a deeper part of you is growing, reaching. You’re searching for sustenance and in the process you are growing. It just never feels that way at the time.” I have also told the story to hundreds of parents who work so hard to meet all needs of their growing teenage children. Holding off their need gratification gives them a chance to seek their own resources, options, and answers. I’ve never been challenged or confronted about its meaning.
As I’ve gotten older, and, hopefully, more seasoned, I’ve come to learn that my patients teach me about the practice of therapy. Books and seminars have their place, but I believe the true learning comes from those who come to us for help. I will always remember Rosalind as my teacher. When I was in the Peace Corps, our director told us that we would learn much more than we would give; this certainly was the case with Rosalind.
Hypnotic storytelling is an amazing application of hypnosis in psychotherapy. The telling of the tale induces a trance-like state and if the story parallels the client’s concern or problem, the outcome at the story’s end is the therapeutic suggestion that leads the client to a solution. In the alert, eyes-open state, these suggestions are as impactful had the client been in a deep, eyesclosed trance. When the story comes from the therapist’s personal experience, the impact is even more meaningful for both therapist and client. Over the years, I have kept a chronicle of personal experiences that I have used in therapy when the experience paralleled that of the client. I invite those of you who are interested in developing your own storytelling to do the same. Journal those experiences you’ve had that were meaningful to you. What you will experience can be magical for both you and your client.
Daniel Skenderian, PhD, received his doctorate from the University of North Texas in 1981. Dr. Skenderian is in full-time private practice in Claremont, California, is on staff at two local hospitals, and consults in a local sleep disorders center for adults and children. He is also an Adjunct Clinical Professor in the doctoral psychology program at The University of LaVerne. Dr.Skenderian has been an ASCH Approved Consultant for many years, and has been practicing hypnosis since 1985. He regularly utilizes hypnosis for insomnia, pain, and psychosomatic disorders. When not working, he enjoys kayaking, reading, writing, and watching his son grow up to be the young man he is today. Dr. Skenderian recently completed writing a one act play about a young man and his relationship with his dying father.
